Thoughts on Love and Everything In Between – Part 1

Love Delayed Isn’t Love Denied

I’m in love with my mind. If people had earthly superpowers, I truly believe mine would be my mind — a gift God took His time to design.

Over the past few months, I’ve written a lot about purpose, and I’ve truly enjoyed it. But recently, there’s been a gentle tug in my heart to explore something else: love. There’s so much I want to say, and I hope I can share it as genuinely as I feel it.

We often hear how important a father’s love is. I just want to echo that truth. Long before I even knew what the term “Girl Dad” meant, I lived it. First as daddy’s little princess, then later as his queen. Everything I understand about love was shaped through my dad.

Before dates were even a thing, he was already modeling what care and presence looked like. He’d take me anywhere I wanted to go, walk with me in the evenings, and bring me along to the park, the zoo, playdates, or church rehearsals. I was even his “fake assistant” proofreading emails he’d already written. But the best part of all? His praise. No one could tell me otherwise once Dad had spoken. He affirmed me constantly, and set a bar for love that I still hold to this day.

As a child, I was a bit too clever for my own good, especially when it came to boys. I got a lot of the classic cold, teasing energy—the kind you see in dramas where the boy hides his feelings with awkward behavior. Why wasn’t anyone teaching them how to express themselves? Why the hair jokes instead of just saying, “I like you”? I always saw through the games, but I often felt bad for them. They clearly lacked better examples.

Attending an all-girls boarding school meant I had even fewer interactions with boys, but my dad’s example remained the strongest influence. Sure, I made a few questionable decisions when it came to relationships later, but I don’t carry regret—only lessons.

In the summer before college, back in 2010, I stumbled upon a song that felt more like a prayer than a melody. It was “Love Is Waiting” by Brooke Fraser. If you’ve followed my writing, you’ll know I have a soft spot for her music. She always seems to write for my seasons.

“I’ll give it time, give it space, and be still for a spell.
When it’s time to walk that way, we’ll want to walk it well.”

I didn’t just like the song. I lived it. It became a quiet anthem, a prayer tucked deep into my spirit:
“Lord, don’t awaken love in me until it’s time.”

And He didn’t.

Ten years passed. Ten. Years.

I didn’t expect ten years to pass, during which I had no desire for a relationship. At times, I wondered if something was wrong with me. But in recent reflections, I’ve started to see the delicate thread that’s been weaving all along.

Do I regret praying that prayer? Maybe sometimes. But then I remember: God guards what is precious to Him. The project manager of my life knew exactly what He was doing.

And so here we are.

Next week, I’ll be back to share how my perspective on love has evolved over the past five years—since God gently reawakened that desire.

Until then, stay well.